So I thought I would share a little more about me and my life..
As you may already know I'm a sufferer of PND, which does bother me at times and gets to me quiet a bit. Seeing as I am a full time - stay at home mother of three small children. I've got two girls and a boy and currently pregnant with my fourth. Yes I enjoy spending time with them and playing, learning new things with them. Making them smile is one of the things that really make me smile and when they have done something that you think it so amazing and special that you just cant help but jump up and down and shout about. Its important to me and them.
However those days that get you down. Woke up in a terrible and cranky mood, tiredness gets to you and makes twice as bad, which is of course not good for you but also not good for your children. There are those days when they smile or laugh they don't even make you happy again. Depending on the mood your in, the mood could be they smile and it makes you feel better or the mood of they smile and giggle and nothing happens, nothing moves you. Which for me would be the worse kind of day I could possibly have.
As I have said before I've been with my partner for 4years now, and yes he is great, helps when he can and is brilliant with the children. you see though, have you ever felt like your so lonely even though you have people around you? Well that's how I feel at times, lonely! I do feel invisible and unloved in a way and that really puts me down. I am on my own a lot which doesn't help how I do feel about things/ life. Just gets you down, you know? With my partner being at work in the day and coming home at night, its almost as if I'm a single parent. Its not the case clearly but with having to do everything, household chores, nursery runs, bills and whatever else that needs doing it can be quite lonely and all round tiring! Most of the time when he arrives home from work, the children are tucked up in bed fast asleep. That can be difficult has sometimes even though he is there he hasn't spent any time with them and usually by the time he does its the weekend. At this point everyone is tired and just wants to rest for the next week ahead.
My weekends are completely different to the weekdays. Everything is packed into one, a rush, the house is mostly in tip top space. However the weekends are nothing like that. Restful, quiet, just the washer going, by the time Monday has arrived its a mad house again. I suppose its nice in a way for having a restful and peaceful weekend, with everything finished in the week there isn't anything left to be done on a Saturday or Sunday. So, I guess that I'm so rushed in the week, its maybe time to re-look at my rota's.